a friendly reminder:
don’t hang out with people that make you feel bad about yourself
We were grabbing a bite of lunch at a small cafe, in a mall, right across from a booth that sold jewelry and where ears could be pierced for a fee. A mother approaches with a little girl of six or seven years old. The little girl is clearly stating that she doesn’t want her ears pierced, that’s she’s afraid of how much it will hurt, that she doesn’t like earrings much in the first place. Her protests, her clear ‘no’ is simply not heard. The mother and two other women, who work the booth, begin chatting and trying to engage the little girl in picking out a pair of earrings. She has to wear a particular kind when the piercing is first done but she could pick out a fun pair for later.
"I don’t want my ears pierced."
"I don’t want any earrings."
The three adults glance at each other conspiratorially and now the pressure really begins. She will look so nice, all the other girls she knows wear earrings, the pain isn’t bad.
She, the child, sees what’s coming and starts crying. As the adults up the volume so does she, she’s crying and emitting a low wail at the same time. “I DON’T WANT MY EARS PIERCED.”
Her mother leans down and speaks to her, quietly but strongly, the only words we could hear were ‘… embarrassing me.’
We heard, then, two small screams, when the ears were pierced.
Little children learn early and often that ‘no doesn’t mean no.’
Little children learn early that no one will stand with them, even the two old men looking horrified at the events from the cafeteria.
Little girls learn early and often that their will is not their own.
No means no, yeah, right.
Most often, for kids and others without power, ”no means force.”
from "No Means Force" at Dave Hingsburger’s blog.
This is important. It doesn’t just apply to little girls and other children, though it often begins there.
For the marginalized, our “no’s” are discounted as frivolous protests, rebelliousness, or anger issues, or we don’t know what we’re talking about, or we don’t understand what’s happening.
When “no means force” we become afraid to say no.
My boyfriend broke up with me and my 80 year old, 5 foot tall, Indian grandmother told me that “there are lots of men…”
I thought she was then going to say “…in the sea” but she said “…they’re like flies” and made a disgusted face.
She hates flies.
whenever i get low on money i start thinking really irrationally like what if i hadn’t spent that $10 back in 2004
i imagine us all being on this website till we’re in our early 30’s making fun of our kids by posting pictures of them
Chris Pratt recalls a story from early in his career when Jimmy went out of his way to show kindness. [x]
The amazing thing about the Toy Story trilogy is the fact that they waited 10 years to conclude the story, so that a story about nostalgia made you feel nostalgic towards the original content.
As of August 18th, 2014: I need a little help, Tumblr. As you know, I had to make an emergency flight home last week because my surrogate family found out Pops had Stage 4 Prostate Cancer. And we’re doing everything to improve the quality of life.
We found out we don’t need to do chemo, but can put him on a type of hormone therapy to delay the outcome and to make it less painful. But because of this, Hospice will be removing the hospital bed in the home. Hospice was already aware, prior to official diagnosis, that we would be seeking any treatment to improve quality and quantity of life. But they came on their own volition anyways, bringing a much needed hospital bed into the home. Now after two weeks, and news that we are indeed seeking treatment… they are removing the bed and stopping services.
He cannot climb stairs. He cannot sleep on a couch. He cannot sleep on the twin bed we have in the dining room for him. I’m not asking for money, I’m asking for a contact that I can speak to about bringing in another hospital bed that won’t be taken away or cost more than finances can bear. I already made calls to people I know who might be able to track down a hospital bed, but I need every ounce of help I can get.
Please reblog. Get me someone who can help my family. They took me in after my own father died from cancer 13 years ago. They’ve been a part of my life over 20 years. And I am doing everything I can to make things right for them during the hardest part of their lives. Help me give them one less thing to worry about.Edit: I’ve gotten a lot of asks about where my family lives. I won’t disclose an official address unless I know for sure that a hospital bed is coming their way, but they live near Harrisburg, PA. Thanks to all the responses so far, whether it’s prayers or suggestions!